would you like that wide a side of sarcasm?

I worked my seccond day at the restaurant today. Well, not worked, trained. In order to be a server you have to train for four days and then pass a final exam. It is indeed rocket science, serving food to people, in case you didn’t know.

I’m glad I have a job though, and so far so good. There’s quite a few people working there, which is nice. The more people at a place, the less it matters if you don’t get along with everyone.

It’s weird how getting along with people tend to be a common issue for me… I am such a lovable person, right?
No, I’m not trying to fool anyone, myself included. I know what and how I am;

-I judge other people very fast. In fact, I don’t know how to relate to people unless I have put a label on them first (cool, smartass, annoying but sweet, stupid, nice, potential friend etc.) I don’t, however, have any problem changing the labels. Cool can go to smartass in one comment and stupid can be bumped right up to potential friend in a matter of a conversation.

-I am not very good at dealing with criticism, it takes very little to make me cry and my skin is rarely thicker than that of a grape.

-Still, I can be quite insensitive to other people’s feelings when it comes to harsh comments and not so constructive criticism.

So right now I am training for a job I really think is below my level of education and capability. At the same time I am nervous I won’t pass the test or do a good job because I really need a job and this is not a bad one compared to some really sucky, minimum wage ones.

I just want to go back to school. Back in time, back to school, back to basics.

my very first political meeting and my bizillionth going away party

I can’t remember last time I went to a going away party that wasn’t for me. Oh wait, actually I can. Like every weekend and a few times in between for the last month.

Jake is going to Uruguay, like for real I think he actually is going to Uruguay, but he hasn’t yet. He has just been going for ever, since we met him actually… because that’s how we ended up talking to him and Bobby, about South America.

So last weekend was his official going away party since he had actually purchased his ticket. It was rough, a lot of fun, but rough. And now tomorrow night is another one. I’m excited, it’s at Charley’s and their Karaoke nights are supposed to be really good. But seriously, if he doesn’t leave after this one, I think we might have to switch and start calling them Welcome Home parties. Mixing it up.

Tonight we went to a meeting with the College of Democrats. I know right? Like what the hell am I doing there? I can’t vote and I don’t know jack shit about the political system here. But as they said themselves, they’re democrats in Idaho; they can’t afford to be picky.... Sad but true. And at least I know enough to know I’d be a democrat if I were in fact American.

And they were all really nice and it wasn’t like a political meeting at all, more like cool, liberal people who want to do a little more than just talk about how much society sucks. And I am definitely up for volunteering at food banks and shelters and stuff where they need my work force more than my political knowledge.

unemplolalalalalayed

Is there a job in Pocatello I haven’t applied for yet?

The bilingual car salesman? Check.
The bakery manager? Check.
The veterinarian? Check.
The nail tech? Check.

Not really, but pretty freakkin close. I am so sick of this I am ready to start singing on the street corners. Soon.

In the mean time I am trying to keep my spirits up.
How’s that working out?
As my Chinese students would say “maybe…so so”

Jaques is cooking up a storm but I just like listening to him

I have no patience with people who take themselves too seriously. Seriously. If you can’t make fun of yourself, you’re not a fun person. Some people just try too hard to come across as this super cool, laid back, awesome guy or girl but as soon as somebody tells a joke on their behalf or they appear in a funny but not so flattering story, they get all defensive and butt hurt and prove that they are anything but laid back and cool. We hung out with a guy like that recently.

Right now I’m watching a cooking show with this French dude. I have no idea what he’s making or what he’s saying really, but I love his accent. French and Spanish people get a kick ass accent when they speak English. Germans tend to sound angry no matter what, Finish people sound constipated, Norwegians sound like they are forced to speak when they really rather be singing, Swedish people sound like they have stick up their ass or are reading from a script, Russians sounds like the words got stuck in the back of their throat and the only way to get them out is by adding a lot of rolling R’s and gurgling noises.

In my opinion.

Oh, I guess he made some kind of rooster dish. Looks French. Now he’s working on a raspberry cake that looks delish.

I jinxed it...

No, I don't really think I jinxed it, but last night I was informed that I didn't get the position at the university. The one professional job in the city of Pocatello, the one job I really, really wanted, the thin thread I hung such heavy hopes on... no wonder it broke.

I broke a little too. Why is it that I always end up crying the night before interviews and important meetings? Last time it was the writing center and I watched I am Sam the night before....good move, I looked like I had goggles on, underneath my skin. And this morning I met with the director of the English departmend regarding my future ESL studies. Puffy, puffy eyes.

I am not in a super good place right now. It will get better I am sure, but right now I am low and blue.

Running out of patience

I am so sick of waiting for people to get back to me. And so sick of people not getting back to me.
Seriously.
So tomorrow I have to let the Child & Adolecent center know if I want the job they gave me Friday. I don't. But I don't know for sure that I have enough pride, money and patience to say no either.

So I go running, I do laundry and I send out a million e-mails applying for jobs I am way over-qualified for and don't even want, but I pretend that I do, and either way it doesn't matter because I still don't hear back from amyone. Discouraging, yes yes it is.

Never gonna get it, never gonna get it

Never gonna get it, never get it.

Fairs and Foods

The first time I ever went to a fair was the Minnesota State Fair in Minneapolis. I was a high school exchange student and had been in the US for less than a week. It was quite the experience, let me tell you.

The farm animals didn’t impress me all that much; I have farmers in my family, although the fact that people got trophies for showing them off, that was something different. But the beauty pageant where they carved the winners face out in a butter statue, the lumber jack show with guys running up huge poles like they were spider man dressed out in flannel and the fried cheese on a stick, that all blew me away.

I’ve been to a few fairs and rodeos since, but there is nothing like that first one. Tomorrow we are hitting the South Idaho State Fair in Blackfoot and hopefully that will be fun and the weather will cooperate, it was raining today.

Right now I’m kind of feeling a little iffy. I had cafeteria dinner with Linnea (the Swedish exchange student) and I feel like my stomach is all out of practise for that all you can eat but probably shouldn’t style buffets. I used to eat Bob’s food all the time in Moscow and it didn’t face me one bit. But right now that tuna bagel clearly doesn’t want to mix with the sesame garlic stir fry. Ugh.
Oh well, some good healthy fair food tomorrow will probably make the system happier…

Fairs and Foods

back to normal after all the cake is gone

The birthday turned out good, Dylan liked his presents (money clip, a vintage t-shirt and a fleece jacket) and the cake was a little dry, I thought (less flour next time) but people still liked it and finished the whole thing.

And Boise State won, which was a nice finish even though I could care less about football. And I mean that, I would care less if it was a non-Idahoan team playing or if it was baseball.

Anyways, today has been less productive, tomorrow I plan on applying for a job at a center for troubled teens and kids. I did get a call back from a gym where I applied...and I might drop by there tomorrow too, if nothing else seems promising... the gym pays quite shitty and is only like 15 hours a week.

It's hard, I feel lazy and unproductive but then I can't apply for jobs that don't exist either.

On a different note

There is a lady in the house on our right.
There is also at least one dog, somewhere between 5 and 10 cats, a nephew of some sort and an older man that seems to spend more time there than anywhere else.

She is an artist of some sort.
She tends to her cats and the dog and the nephew and the man. She sees the world in a different way than I do, I think.
I often think she is kind of crazy. Then I feel bad and think that she is probably a way better person than I will ever be.

There is a guy in the house on our left. He lets an ex-convict live with him for free. He mows the lawn for the lady with the cats and then they smoke pot together.

There are dirty dishes in my kitchen and they bother me so much more than the financial crisis.

Bengals, Vandals & Unemployment

The Bengals played the Vandals yesterday. Dylan doesn’t think women’s’ soccer is very interesting and I don’t think soccer in general is very interesting if the teams are not really good or if I don’t know any of the players. Last Friday we sat through a whole game and it was pretty brutal so yesterday we showed up with 20 minutes left of the game and saw the Vandals win. I was rooting for them too, I don’t feel like a Bengal and their fans were also freaking annoying.

Today it’s time for American football, first game of the season. Same as for soccer, I wouldn’t go if it wasn’t for the social aspect, lots of people are going and I’m sure it will be a good time, sort of. I just can’t get over how long an American football game is, after 20 real minutes sometimes not even 2 minutes has passed on the game clock. I would also probably focus more on the game and less on the clock if I knew the rules… which I do more know than 5 years ago…but still, I can’t say I get it.

Nice with a 3 day weekend, for me it doesn’t really make a difference since I still have no job… but it makes me fell less bad about not having one when other people are off too. Still no word back from any of the ones I applied for. I’m getting really sick of waiting.