Unfriend

Why I deleted you from facebook today?
Because I forgot to do it sooner.
You need more reasons, ask you ex-wife. Or that God of yours you keep talking about. Maybe if you weren't so busy talking shit all the time, you would actually have a minute to look into stuff like.... oh I don't know, love, forgiveness, tolerance, acceptance... Although the inside of your asshole is probably blocking the view.
Whatever, bye.

It's 10:30am on this beautiful morning

So far today I've found out I have asthma and that we have to resubmit all the documentation supporting our marriage to the Department of Homeland Security.
Can't wait to see what else this day has in store for me.

Watching cooking shows for inspiration

I've been plowing through Hell's Kitchen, Master Chef (not my favourite) and now Kitchen Nighmares. Do I just love cooking shows?
No. Not really.
Don't care much for Chopped or Top Chef.
Never felt like actually cooking anthying I see them make on the show.
I just love Gordon Ramsey.
Good God that man knows how to chew people out. I wish they didn't have to bleep out the bad words, I feel like he's pretty creative with his cussing, and I'd just love to hear it.
Piss off.

12 is the new 10

Why oh why... University administration, do you feel it necessary to have people work around the calendar year when clearly so little is going on during the summer?
No no, I get it, there are summer classes and maintenance and programming and preparing for fall and all of that.
We can't close business, I'm not saying we should, just that it makes no sense to push for all 12-month contracts when it would save the university money and increase people's life quality if some people could be on 10 and 11 month contracts.
Is it really that hard for pay roll to figure out?
Is that why?

This reminds me of China when teachers were encouraged to bring sleeping mats to work so they could take a nap during meaninglessly long workdays.
You can't go home, we might need you, but you don't have to work the whole time you're here either. 

A secretary I know brings books and magazines to the office to keep entertained during the long summer days. That's what her boss told her to do when she asked what all she should be doing during the summer, since there are no students in their departments.
Read magazines.
On the university dollar.

My precious

If anybody saw me standing outside my house yesterday, staring at the fence in total disbelief for probably well over 5 minutes, here's why:
My goddam bike was stolen!
Pisses me right off.
They didn't take any of the other bikes (I mean mine was clearly the best one, but still). Just mine. And I love that bike too.
I filed a police rapport. Do I think that'll help me get it back? No. But I felt like I had to do something. And starring at the fence wasn't cutting it. Speaking of which, they didn't cut the fence, which means they must've cut the lock, or picked it. I loved that lock too, godamit!

Good News is Better than Bad News

Considering facebook is where I learned my grandmother had passed away, it only makes sense that's where I would find out my brother got engaged.

Is there something in the water?

A rainy Friday on campus and people seem to be in a really good mood. Just all over.
It might just be the Friday factor.
Or the misty fog of breathable air hanging low over the hills and soothing airways sore from heat and dust.
A campus free from students?
Whatever it is, it's welcome.

Oh life, you're such a sneaky bitch

Just cause I just wrote that.... Now I'm going to post about my lunch.
No pictures, though.
I try to bring lunch to work most days. But I didn't toady so I went over to the SUB to get a wrap sandwich.
Just a sandwich.
Not a dairy free pasta alfredo with extra sauce on the side minus the broccoli plus chives.
Not too complicated. You wouldn't think.
But the guy manning the bagel joint today.... not his day today, or possibly ever, I don't know him.
But you know that feeling, when you place an order and see the look on the guys face and just want be like
"Actually, forget it. I know you're gonna fuck this one up, and I don't want to pay for a fucked up sandwich.... so just cancel it. Cool?"
I feel that way a lot. I never actually say it though. And I didn't today either.

Go Blogs!

I tried Twitter and quit.
I’m a Twitter-quitter. 
I also quit Pintrest.
It bugs the shizzle out of me when people update their facebook status 8 times a day about meaningless shit. I can’t see the point of most posts on most social media sites.
Hashtags make me break into a mental rash.
And yet I run two blogs.
Hypocrite much?

Sure. Maybe I am. A little.
But…. You don’t have to navigate to this page and read this unless you want to. I’m not posting my flyers all over your bulletin board, drowning whatever other posters you might be interested in.
There is not much substance to this blog, and I know that.
But they are still my thoughts. Not pictures of my lunch. I don’t know. This is as much a criticism of others as it is a justification of my own (similar) behavior. 
Maybe it is all the same.
But I still think blogs are different.

Fish for your farewell

I took Tiffany to lunch as opposed to giving her a graduation gift she'd just have to pack and haul cross country. Or drink. But I saw a lot of other people offering gifts of that kind, so....
Anyways, we lunched.
Salmon and greens. I don't particularly like salmon. I know it's a super food and super good for you and all that stuff.... so now that it's over I feel pretty good about having eaten it. But it's not a fave.
Not a fave.
Also not  a fave is seeing people packing up and moving away, leaving me here.... Not cool.
Or saying goodbye in general. Don't like it.

Selfish

I wandered around the store for a long time yesterday, picking out all sorts of delish stuff to nosh on while watching The Voice and being all Sunday mellow.
What I didn't buy was cat food, so while I was still feeling full this morning... Daisy acted like she needs to eat every single day or something.
She's so spoiled.

Retail therapy

I just ordered new running shoes. Oh happiness.

Done

I love that feeling of having handed in the final report/paper/teaching portfolio/whatever of the semester.
It's out of your hands.
The typos will stand, the attachments may be out of order, the date may be wrong... whatever.
No more last checks. Couldn't change it if I wanted to.
Out of my hands.
Liberating.

The art of dressing

Again, the surprises that await you when you pack your gym bag the night before and then get dressed in the locker room with no alternatives to what you happened to throw in the bag.
Do two white shirts sufficiently cover a zebra print bra?
The answer is either yes nobody can tell or no but my coworkers are too nice to say anything.
Oh well.

My summer is 10 months long

For the last couple of months I've been using the word summer very freely and frequently, as this magical point in time where tons and tons of work will happen.
Sorta like this:

- Oh yeah, it's definitely something we plan on looking at this summer!
- I actually think the summer would be a great time to really dig deeper into this and look at new ways of structuring our mission..
- Oh for sure! How about we get together this summer and talk about it...?
- So I was thinking this summer, maybe we could work on formulating a plan for this...

And so on and so forth. So considering summer hours officially start next week, and considering that I'll be gone all of July... I should perhaps start looking closer at just how I plan on delivering all this work?
Maybe.

Mushy

I just read the class evaluations from my ESL-students.
My heart melted a little bit.

The calm before the storm

Except I'm not calm.
And I really hope there will be no storm.
At least not tonight.
I keep saying I'm so glad the sun will be shining on our parade, so if it actually starts raining... you know who jinxed it.
About to teach my last ESL seminar of the semester in about an hour. Then the last work-event of the semester is tonight. Then writing that final paper and then.....
This is the countdown, it's winding down.
But right now it's really hectic.
The storm before the calm.